Stepping Out!

Obviously this is how the Monty Python boys stayed so thin.

Obviously this is how the Monty Python boys stayed so thin.

The journey of a thousand miles may begin with a single step, but the journey of 10,000 Steps a day for a month begins with this single thought:

‘Well, how hard could it be?’

So two weeks ago I strapped a pedometer to my waist and have been harnessed to the little slave driver ever since.

And later that day, Long Suffering Wife showed me how shaking it made my walk count rise faster than our electricity bill.

After pointing out that this was technically cheating, I learned two more things:

  1. Pedometers are virtually indestructible, and
  1. A pedometer ricocheting off your head and onto the floor adds another five steps to your daily total.

It was interesting to note that my daily walk with Long Suffering Wife’s dogs is approximately two and a half thousand steps, but when I clipped the pedometer to Dumb Dogs’ collar he racked up nearly five thousand steps over the same distance.  Mind you, half of those were toilet stops so they don’t really count.

But the dogs did keep me motivated.  One afternoon they inspired me to walk a little faster by herding an angry brown snake onto the track I was dreamily dawdling along.  I don’t know how many steps I did from that point on, but they were all pretty big ones.

In addition to the slightly enraged wildlife, I’ve also endured energy sapping heat waves, falling branches, fly plagues, rogue cyclists, numerous trips, insect bites, a grassfire, chafing and sandshoe fatigue.

Thankfully, with each passing day, it’s getting easier to tot up my 10,000 Steps, but doing them in the Great Australian Outdoors will probably kill me.

About Greg Bray

The scribbler behind the 'On a Lighter Note' column.
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